Apprehensive Exams

Whoops! I meant comprehensive. Paging Dr Freud...

I had 8 hours worth of questions. So far, I've gotten results on two of the hours. I passed them! Two down, eight to go.

I ran into that professor in the hall as she was turning in the exams she had graded. She didn't look too happy with me, and I know why: I'm not exactly thrilled with my grade. However, pass/fail is pass/fail, and I suppose that ultimately what matters is that I've grown from this experience, and I certainly have! However, I wanted to show a little better.

Yes, I know I have reason to be distracted. I realize that (every 20 minutes, when I'm in the ladies' room). However, in spite of my philosophy of growth through learning, and growth - not grade - being the goal, something deep in me wants 1) an A every time and 2) to have my teacher pleased with me. Not necessarily mutually exclusive; this combination of factors worked fairly well for me until lately.

However, I suppose that even a B- in my worst subject (and it was!) is reason to celebrate. Passing is passing is passing!

But please understand if I dig my toe in the ground and say "I guess so" when I'm congratulated on my passing. I don't feel like I deserved it. But I AM glad I passed. I think I'll feel better when I know what the other 6 hours bring.

Here is the countdown ticker!

The genders are in...

We have a boy and a girl! Yea! Both are measuring a few days ahead, and everything looks good. We opted for no invasive testing, so no amnio, but it didn't look like we needed it anyway. Hooray!

Comps are over

and I can't even have a drink. So, if you read this, have a drink for me. Actually, make that a double. Anything but scotch--blech.

If you are thinking, "Comps?!?" those are the exams I have to pass in order to graduate. If I fail a section, I can take it over---ONCE. And I'd have to continue another semester. No pressure or anything. Also, most of the questions were totally random, except for the one where I was to prepare all of the vocal music in the history of the world--west AND east--UP TO 1750. Oh, and I ought to know the instrumental forms, too... that is the exam that worries me. I should know more in a few weeks. Let me rephrase that: I should know if I get to graduate this semester in a couple of weeks. -=sigh=- So, no, I don't really feel relieved.

Two more major hurdles, assuming I pass: my recital (November 5th, y'all come) and a paper for the same professor who gave me the evil (did I mention it took me two hours for just hers?) question. After that, I can relax and just be pregnant. And teach voice. And (possibly) direct my choir. We'll see--it is getting hard to stand up for very long.

Pregnancy complaint disclaimer: I'm really happy about being pregnant. Complaining about pregnancy symptoms is like complaing about cafeteria food: we secretly actually like most of it, but would look like a geek if we admitted it out loud...

I'm 15 weeks along (that's a week shy of four months, for those of you who hate math) and can no longer sleep on my stomach. I'm thinking about buying a glider--a friend of mine spent her entire 3rd trimseter sleeping in hers. Quit laughing; it isn't funny. Aside from not being able to roll over, and the occasional food aversion, I don't really feel pregnant. I'm starting to show, but if you didn't know I was pg you'd just think I'd gotten fat again. Distressing, but I'm trying not to let it worry me; I've got bigger fish to fry than other people's opinions of my figure. As long as my doctor is happy, I'm happy; he says I can gain 40 - 50 pounds with twins, and I've only gained 7 so far. The sciatica is getting pretty rough, too; if I'm on my feet for more than about 20 minutes, my back starts to kill me and my right thigh falls asleep--weird in the extreme. I told someone several weeks ago that I would rather have sciatica than morning sickness, and I'm about to retract that; morning sickness would be over by now, but the sciatica is only going to get worse. Yippee!

So aside from getting fat, having trouble sleeping and walking, and an utter lack of the ability to concentrate for extended periods of time, I don't feel pregnant at all!